The Card

Every infertile's worst nightmare- the deluge of Christmas cards of precocious children or "perfect" families. But what to do when you're on the other side?

Last year, our Christmas card was essentially a birth announcement and I figured it wasn't as bad as some, but this year I have really been pondering "the card." The photo cards I picked are just of the little man (absolutely no need to plaster my ugly mug on something sent around the country) and our Christmas letter is pretty much all baby-focused (I didn't do much all else this year). My Christmas list contains a few real-life infertiles- two of whom have resolved their infertility this year- one by adopting and the other by becoming pregnant. But what to do about the others, send a generic, non-photo card? No letter and write a hand-written note?

And my thoughts in this area got me thinking even more. Not just about how glowing toddler news might affect my infertile friends still in the trenches. But what about the family from church whose seven-year-old nephew died last month? Or the elderly woman whose two-year-old great-grandson was just diagnosed with a brain tumor?

Infertility changed me. I can not just blithely bombard the world with my joy like the fertile world.